You’ve heard of Big Oil: well, meet Big Pizza

Yes, apparently the pizza lobby won out last week when Congress voted pizza a vegetable for school lunches.  Maybe Godfather’s Pizza made our representatives an offer they couldn’t refuse.  Maybe Little Caesar repeated “Pizza pizza” enough to hypnotize them when they cast their vote.  Perhaps Olive Garden posed the horrible specter that Endless Breadsticks might come to an untimely end.  Perhaps our reps were afraid of another Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, and apparently those same tomatoes failed to tell anybody that they are actually a fruit.

Whatever the case may be, Congress delivered the decision in 30 minutes or less.

Mama Celeste, the Red Baron, and the Pillsbury Doughboy were not available for comment.

Congress, stand firm against healthy school lunches.  Stand firm!